Dear Lola

My name is Lola, and I would like to formally invite you into the unhinged inner workings of my mind. I’ve always wanted to have a blog, and so at the young age of thirty-two—today, on my actual birthday—I decided to be brave and just go for it.

The Notes app on my phone has endured sooo much already, and I think it’s time we give that brave soldier a break and pay the $4 a month to post my inner monologue publicly. Have I spent $4 on stupider things? Absolutely! Do I worry about the $4 being wasted on a blog I might not maintain because I have ADHD and struggle with discipline? Yeah…

I’ll be writing in a diary format because I think it’s fun. I’ve always enjoyed reading from that first-person perspective—it has always felt more intimate, more honest, and more forgiving. I think it will give me the space to express myself more authentically. And maybe I like talking to myself. Sue me, haha.

In a world where we can have the answer to every question we’ve ever had instantly, avoid eye contact entirely, and never be mildly inconvenienced, I want to do the opposite. I want to wonder. I want to ask people instead of Google. I want to sit with the discomfort of not knowing what comes next. I want to feel things deeply, create without rules, and romanticize the very human experience of figuring it out as I go.

Welcome to the chaos.